Life. The basics...
World Mental Health Day musings
“All stress, anxiety, depression, is caused when we ignore who we are, and start living to please others.” - Paulo Coelho
Today is World Mental Heath Day, everyday is. I don't usually dive into these particular events but it seemed to resonate this year.
Poor mental health is something I have often struggled to admit.
I've been depressed in my life. In fact, looking back quite a few times and each slightly different. Although I wasn't allowed to name it as such.
Lots of shame about feeling that way. Guilt of being unable to "feel happy."
Why am I different?
Why can't I just be happy?
Why can't I be like everyone else?
During my physical recovery from Graves Disease, I noticed how truly disconnected I had become from life. I was dying inside and watching the world play out on a screen in front of me.
Graves disease was tough, but it did slow me down enough to listen to my 'broken and lost self.'
In between the rage and horror of what was happening within me and how that affected my outer world, I found a place for compassion and kindness.
I needed peace and slowness.
I used walking - processing thoughts and emotions.
I took photographs - noticing life and moments of joy.
I went out in nature - watched it mirror the life I still held within me.
It was a process.
Living with or returning from depression is different for every single person. Compassion and understanding with ourselves is so important but often hard to negotiate. Being held and seen in our authenticity and to have our feelings witnessed can be helpful to reconnect us to our inner world. Our true nature.
For many of us, being open about the struggles we’ve faced throughout life and how they have affected us can be incredibly hard. Perhaps choose today to tap in and feel if it's the right time for you to seek the support you need.
If you feel this is not the time, finding space for yourself to engage in uplifting activities, connecting with people you care for, learning a new skill and reflecting on how you have changed can be invaluable.
During the colder Winter months I start to slow down as much as possible. I begin to reflect on the last months and notice what has changed and moved.
I try to focus on routine, learning, nutrition, exercise and sleep to keep my energy at a good level and to ensure my mind and body have all they need.
Over the last year I have cut out a lot in my life and truly focused on my basic needs. It has been quite a time and this helps return me to balance.
Throughout life many of us misunderstand our basic needs, especially if we have a background of chronic stress and chaos. This can lead to developing unhealthy ways to meet them. We overindulge, mix them up or remain with a feeling of emptiness. These needs are essentials to living a healthy life.
Our brains are wired for pleasure and I, like many others had a pattern of finding the quick fix to make me feel better rather than dealing with what was right at the root.
Basic needs (Abraham Maslow)
Physiological - Food, water, shelter, and sleep
Safety - Employment, resources, morality, the family, health, and property
Love and belonging - Friendship, family and a sense of connection
Esteem - Respect, self-esteem, status, recognition, strength, and freedom
Self-Actualisation - The desire to become the best that one can be
These seem particularly stark when laid out as such but you can see the premise, what is required and what so many of us seem to be missing in our lives.
Pleasure. Movement. Connection. Nourishing food. Safety. Contentment. A drive to create and our Spiritual connection.
It doesn't seem much, but by looking at where these may be out of balance allows us to tune into why that might be.
We all have patterns and behaviours we would rather not give into and this is a good way to find out why we still do. Working with these needs often helps us tine into one of the very fundamentals which is a sense of safety.
Wherever you are on your path I hope you are able to find some pleasure in the Autumn colours and to reflect on how beautiful you really are.
If you need some help to let go this Autumn drop me a reply to this email or book a call.
