From a young age I have loved books and stories. I come from the days when teachers sat you down for "story time" at the end of the day. I absolutely loved it.
Enthralled by the unfolding mystery of the words and sentences. It was my enjoyment and my escape.
When things got difficult I read a story. Hans Christian Anderson was one of my childhood favourites - The Princess and the Pea had me totally held whilst I was being read to. We all have a our favourite stories no matter how passionate we may or may not be about literature.
I was reminded the other day of all the stories and possibilities we all hold inside of us. All of our lives contain millions of decisions and each time a decision is taken over another the outcomes differ. Millions of different variations of paths we will take or could have taken and how that can change the outcome of our lives for good.
Our lives have millions of ways they could turn out, based on our decision at that moment. And the only way to learn, is to make the decision... and then live it.
It's hard to predict how the story will turn out, the things that will make us happy. Ultimately we make decisions in the moment based on current circumstances which will change in the moment based on that decision.
IF we make the decision.
And here is my point.
We don't get to see how the story will turn out before we make the decision. That's cheating. Like turning to the last page of the book to reveal the ending without hearing the full story. You miss so much by doing that.
Yes you get to see how it turned out, but what happened? How did it happen ? who did they meet along the way that got them to that point. You see?
Books and stories are based on mystery and wonder. So does life. The journey is a gift. If we choose it.
Some of you may read this weekly offering and know my story, for those of you that don't...I spent a lot of my life not choosing life. Not my own anyway, I chose everybody else's. It was easier to encourage others, cheering from the side lines and watching them do well.
I didn't want to dive in and experience it myself because, what if I failed? What of I got hurt? What if others didn't like my choices? What if it all turned to shit? Would I cope? Would I manage?
I was fearful of it because I craved a sense of safety that had been elusive to me as a youngster.
I found so many ways of staying put and was inevitably hurting me and others. Internally I wasn't happy but pretending to be so, there was incongruence. And people could see it, feel it and smell it off me. I would also get angry and struggle to express it because my frustration was my inability to choose my own life and be brave enough to live it. Fully.
I didn't want to look at my shit either. I so wanted to be bold and shine bright but I HAD to make the choice. I struggled for so long that in the end the Universe found a way. I got ill and life became unbearable to live the way it was.
Sometimes it is tough. But would you prefer someone else write your ending? Would you like to spend the rest of the story hiding behind the bed clothes in case the wolf you thought you had slain is still out there?
Or would you like to create the ending yourself?
If the choice is the latter, when will you start?Today? Tomorrow?
Or when the story becomes one you put back on the shelf and pretend you never started?
I wish you well on your creation.